Class Reunion

Characters

Class

Outside Class

Intro

Lightningtail, warden of Canterlot Stallion Jail, has never expected to see her former classmates as inmates, let alone simply for "insulting a figure of authority" or "parading". But things keep on getting weirder as she gets choked nearly every day. Very short chapters, great for quick reads.



Prologue

A group of ponies were gathered in a circle.

"Flamingo, Milkshake, and Kate," said the white pony in the middle, "you're the brains. You can figure this out. Other ponies will help you."

"Fire Heart, River Flow, and Leaf Dapple," he continued, "you will find all ponies Goldfish has made contact with in at least three months." Three ponies nodded.

"Veil and Yin, report immediately if there's any news from the police or Princess Twilight.

"Fang and Eridan, try to keep this off the media for as long as possible. Don't let anypony but our class know about Goldfish's death unless it's really needed. I trust you to handle this well."

"What about the police? Or Twilight?" a black pony spoke up.

"Any other ponies, Yin." the white pony, Yang, replied. "And as for the rest, wait for further instructions. Clear?"

The group nodded. A gray unicorn with yellow eyes raised his hoof.

"Yes, Eridan?" said Yang.

"Lightningtail's not here today. Shall we tell her about... about Goldfish?"

"Lightningtail... Don't know if we can trust her. She is a retired cop, right?"

Eridan drooped, fiddling with his scarf. The meeting was at an end.

1: Surprise

Lightningtail was flipping through the files of the new prisoner when she choked on her muffin.

Eridan? Was it a namesake? But the picture was clearly him...

Eridan, Lightningtail's former classmate before she graduated. Though the picture on the file was black-and-white, she could clearly picture his perfect gray coat in her mind. His shining amber-yellow eyes. His little horn which was surrounded by a purple aura when he used it.

What kind of crime did her crush commit?

Oh, no. Not her crush, seriously! Eridan was married and had two foals. It would be stupid to have a crush on him.

But being rational didn't help. Lightningtail still loved Eridan.

"Sentenced to life for insulting a figure of authority," said the file. That was strange. Lightningtail was sure that nothing like this happened when Celestia and Luna were ruling. But things sure had changed a lot since Twilight became Queen...

Rushing to the window in her office, Lightningtail peeked out to see Eridan arriving. Even with the horn restraint and a chain on his neck, his handsomeness shone out... Stop thinking about this! Lightningtail ordered herself, pulling away from the window. He hadn't changed much, and his purple highlight in his jet-black mane was still there. The only things missing were his blue striped scarf, and its absence made his neck look a lot longer.

Lightningtail plopped back down her desk. She'll deal with it later. For now, she had a fine morning to enjoy.

The morning wasn't so fine. Instead of sitting in front of the computer, drawing comics and leaving all the work to her secretary, Eva, and her deputy, Steel Knuckles, like she did every day, she had to call Eridan to her office. And Eva wasn't being really helpful either. In fact, she seemed to be a lot lazier these days. Man, she was getting too well-paid.

"Eva!" Lightningtail yelled.

Eva walked in lazily, levitating a cup of coffee with her horn. "What's up?"

"I want you to get Eridan. That new one who just arrived this morning."

"Why don't you get him yourself if you want to meet him so much?"

Lightningtail felt that she might explode. "You're my secretary, for Celestia's sake! I said, go get him!"

Eva rolled her eyes and went back out, leaving the door open.

"Close the door!" Lightningtail shouted after her.

SLAM went the poor door. It bounced on its frame several times before stopping. Lightningtail rubbed her temples and forced herself to calm down.

2: The Talk

Eridan came in escorted by three guards. Lightningtail debated with herself for a bit, but still ordered hoofcuffs on him. When the three guards exited her office, she looked up from her computer and growled.

Eridan's eyes popped wide, recognizing her immediately. "Lightningtail?"

"Eridan?" Lightningtail mimicked his tone. "You look weird without your scarf." she commented, though she knew that it was far from the truth.

"You look weird without your gigantic hat," Eridan retorted, reaching a hoof towards his neck, only to be pulled back by the hoofcuffs. "So, I thought you were, you know, retired?"

"I retired from the police department," Lightningtail growled, "It's stupid to think I would just sit at home doing nothing! I need to have a permanent income too!" she flared her black-tipped wings open, "By the way, what did you do after graduation? I haven't heard from you in almost eight years."

"Umm... It's kind of a long story."

Lightningtail growled, "Of course eight year's a long story!" She was beginning to regret even having this chat. "Fine, just tell me how you ended up with a life sentence for 'insulting a figure of authority'. Did you call Twilight a whore or something?"

"Well... Kind of." Eridan tapped his hoof on the table, "I... I said that she was... she was an evil dictator, and... and a guard heard me, like that?"

Lightningtail narrowed her eyes. "She sure was acting like an evil dictator." she commented.

"What did you expect? New queen do have to face a lot of challenges."

"And I suppose you have met a lot of new queens in your whole miserable lifetime!" Lightningtail rolled her big blue eyes. "How's your wife and children doing?"

"Aw, don't mention," Eridan leaned back on his chair, "we got divorced."

Lightningtail bolted upright, "Seriously?"

"Yeah, as soon as I got arrested! The police was like, 'dude, you're arrested for blah blah blah' and she was like 'jeez you're a fathead I'm taking my babies somewhere else ha ha' man, she 's the fathead! As if I hadn't been the planet spinning around her all the time."

?: ???

The coroner was a white-coated blank-flank. He was almost as old as the Mane Six, but Lightningtail wasn't going to be impolite and ask about his cutie mark.

However, Fang was. "Why don't you have a cutie mark?" she asked him.

He winced, and replied, "I used to, but then I lost it. Long story."

"What was your mark?"

He hesitated before answering, "A pony skull."

It was Fang's turn to wince, and the coroner's expression clearly indicated that he was used to this kind of wincing.

?: How Do You Spell Lightningtail?

Eva snuck in front of Lightningtail's desk. She didn't need to sneak, of all things in the middle of the night when nopony could ever catch her, but you know, just for effect.

She had seen Lightningtail unlock her computer too many times. She knew the password like the back of her hoof. The front hooves, not the back ones. She didn't know her back hooves that well.

Turning it on, she created a new text document. The comics her boss drew were tempting, but she had more important things to do.

She typed what she needed in to the document and saved it. Next, she opened the email application and wrote a email. Smiling evilishly, she turned off the computer. Tomorrow was going to be the best day of her life.

Twilight was reading some interesting fan fictions on the Internet when she received an email.

That was strange. Who sent emails at night? Not wanting to lose any time reading the story, she simply replied "Sure" and went on reading.

The next day, Steel Knuckle claimed himself the warden of Canterlot Stallion Jail.

"Nuh-uh," Eva said. "You're not. I am."

"That makes no sense," Steel replied, "I'm formerly the deputy. Now Lightningtail quit, and I become warden. You're just my secretary."

Eva grinned. "She made me deputy at the last second."

Steel took a step forward. "No she didn't!"

Eva strided to Lightningtail's computer, turned it on and opened the text document. "eva is now deputy and will be warden when i quit signed lightinitakl," she read out loud.

"She spelled her own name wrong," Steel deadpanned, "and you expect me to believe it?"

"I didn't believe my eyes when I saw it either," Eva said, "but I figured she was kind of in a rush."

Seeing that Steel was still unconvinced, she said, "Lightning also sent a message to Princess Twilight Sparkle herself." She opened the email. "Check it out yourself."

Hey dude

mind if i let eva be the deputy instead of stell knuckels huh

lihgtnntail

Re: Hey dude

Sure.

Steel stared at it, eyes as wide as his mouth, which was nearly touching the floor. "S-somepony's impostoring Twilight! It must be it!"

"Check out her email adress," Eva smirked, "It's her, no doubt. And 'impostor' is not a verb."

Steel wouldn't give up. "You still have to go through legal proceedings! You can't just email somepony and, and, just like that!"

"It's not just somepony," Eva said smugly, "It's Princess Twilight! She agreed, none of that so-called 'legal proceedings' required."

Steel's fur on his whole body flared up in temper. He stormed away without another word, slamming the door behind him.

Eva seated herself behind the now-hers computer. Warden had double wages than the secretary. Double! It had been a long time without getting any checks from Leaf Dapple, and she was too used to her luxurious life to go back to her old "saving money like saving the world and being bossed around by Lightningtail" one. Now that she was warden, she could say good-bye to Leaf Dapple. But Leaf was a great help, too; Eva reminded herself to thank her someday.

?: ???

Lightningtail woke up to a dazzling room adorned with jewels. (More description needed) The air definitely felt much warmer here than the snowy city outside.

"Wha..." moaned Lightningtail. She actually meant to say, "Where am I?" but the words came out blurry. Her head still hurt, and the bright reflections of gems in the room wasn't helping. Her wings felt numb and heavy. Her mane draped all over her face, but her hooves were too tired to brush then away.

Then she realized. ''The decor. The gems. Heck, I'm in the Princess's own room!''

"Why did you bring me here? Where's Kate?" Lightningtail asked.

"First question, I felt like it." Princess Twilight answered, "Second, she's in a happier place now. Kind of a waste."

"Y-you killed Kate?!"

"Yeah, many ponies get surprised by that. You know, it's not like me to kill a pony painlessly. But I was in kind of a rush." Twilight shrugged, leaning back on the chair. "But I have a lot of time on my hooves now."

Oh, Lightningtail realized, ''I'm going to die here. And Twilight's not going to make it quick.''

Might as well Keep talking slow her down.

"Why are you doing this? You're a pony, just like me."

Twilight winced. Lightningtail knew it hit home. She had seen the MLP movie after all.

But the Princess recovered almost immediately and chuckled the "classic villian chuckle". "You are wrong and right, Lightning." she said. "Wrong, because I'm an alicorn, the greatest of all, and formerly a unicorn, the alicorn's right-hand-pony. And you're just a pegasus. Luckily you're not one of those earth low-lifes."

"All lives are equal," Lightningtail hissed through gritted teeth.

"Interesting that you think that." Twilight sneered. "Earth ponies obey pegasi and unicorns. Pegasi obey unicorns. They all obey me, and Cadance in the Crystal Empire. Earth ponies are nothing but mere food-growers."

Lightningtail felt like she was losing the argument. Who could beat a Princess? And this talk could end in violence too. But she was willing to give it a try. "If it wasn't for earth ponies, we'd all starve."

"Hey, I wasn't saying that they should die. I keep them alive, and they -- including unicorns and pegasi -- make sure I thrive. See, that even rhymes! But you're missing the point. I said, you're both wrong and right. Do you know why you're right, of all things?"